Nothing good ever happens to people named George in songs.

4 is like, statistically impossible. Dont ever name your kids George people. Bad things happen to them.

Toto: Georgy Porgy (aka George loses his lover bc he blows it and goes all soft on her.)


Actually, the song/poem GP is supposed to be about King James' supposed gay lover George Villers.

Here's the real "georgie porgie" in action:
Villiers reciprocated the king's love and wrote to James: "I naturally so love your person, and adore all your other parts, which are more than ever one man had" and "I desire only to live in the world for your sake". Villiers gained support from those opposed to the current favourite, Robert Carr, 1st Earl of Somerset.

So georgie made em cry b/c he liked to "do" the boys. The King no less. Damn George. Flatter a man's penis and it will get you anywhere, huh?

To recap: its a song about a girl who has sex with lots of men, with a reference to a poem about a boy who harasses girls but is actually really about a gay courtier but they changed it to be hetero. Phew. Got that?

Rod Stewart: The Killing of Georgie (Georgie is gay and gets beat to death)

Oh lord, get your hankies and barf buckets ready. How brave of you, Rod. With a name like Rod, and a penchant for wearing lipstick, you "went there" and wrote what is probably the most "im ok with you gays" song there ever was. And this from such a hetero specimen as Rod. No one gay would have done that "Infatuation" crap. You know, the song with the video where he stalks that frosted haired lady. That song stinks of balding desperate heterosexuality. Like a Mets game.

Some drag queen singing Van Morisson's Madame George (aka: a song written by a drunk about another drunk).

I dont like this song. But i will say this version is an improvement.

And as a preemptive bitch, all you VM morons go die. I like VM but i dont like Madame George. Everyone needs to stop sweating that song. People like, loooove this song. I dont understand why. I never understood why. And unfortunately, unlike college, there is no one i can cheat off of to understand why. So, I will go to my death not knowing. But Ive made my peace with that.

And, last but not least.
Mc Lyte: Poor Georgie. (aka: Dont drive while depressed and keep your hair tight always even when drunk)

Georgie-you win! Although you were a drunk and probably spun the "std wheel" a little too often for my tastes, he's dead and hes got a girl writing songs about how dope he was even WITH bad hair.
In comparison to heartbreak, smashing your head on a rock or being a saggy tittied drag queen in some dank bar, Georgie made it out ok.

And by ok I mean completely horribly. But its the best we can hope for in these sad times.