Saturday, May 8, 2010

Thats Not Entertainment

Its fucking nightmarish. On a couple of levels. All of which you are lucky enough to read me discuss. Dont say i never gave you anything.

Ok. First, some advice. Just SHAKE it off. Go for a walk, drink a gallon of gin, do push ups... do whatever it is you need to do to allow you to eternal sunshine of the spotless mind this shit and wipe that look of horror off your face. Its just a song and dance routine after all. Yes yes, most dance routines dont have singing triplets walking around like crabs, and showing off the moves they honed @ the exorcist dance studio, but still, theres some choreography and that qualifies it technically as dance. Dance isnt scary*. Usually.

Second. Ok, a song about solid potato salad. I think the aim here is to continue to eat this salad, repeatedly. As in one plate after the other. And then, break all your bones to burn off what you just ate Like that whole slide down your back and eat that creepy ass apple thing she did. I mean, i took off a week from work just to think about it, and i really cant see any other reason for whatever it was you just watched. Maybe you can?

Anyway, as appealing as the Shining Twins plus one serving me clumpy potato salad is, the lyrics are really what stir me (pun totally intended). Im palid; does their advice apply to me? But i cant understand half of what they are saying! What if i need this information? I got "POE day TOE salad" and "some shit about groovy" but they lost me afterwards. And im sure everyone involved in this trash ( ironically, much like the potato they sing about) is takin a dirt nap, so there's no way i can ask. Bad news DOES come in threes.

Now, lets get to the meat and POTATOES here. No, what makes this mess ponder worthy is that this was considered entertainment. Its actually from "thats entertainment" (part three, but still). From what i gather, said entertainment films are the equivalent of the "entertainment intensive immersion class": oodles of gene kelly and "shit, that name sounds familiar" people singing and dancing, and, were representative of the A list of entertainment routines of the day. Which makes me wonder: to what generation did a song about solid potato salad appeal to? And are they dead yet?

After google did my math, this shitty ditty is 66 years old. (hmph, wheres that other 6 when you need it). So, if the average life of a man is like 86 or something, there is a possibility that there are, walking amongst us, people who actually thought this passed for "entertainment".

Yes, some of these people walk among us. And they should be applauded. Cos this, despite my complaints, IS some serious shit: and to survive this assault on the senses, and to live in an era that considered THIS entertainment prolly makes you have wontons of steel. Just imagine: instead of songs about sex, it was songs about food. And other boring nouns. Really. Lets raise our plates to them. Cos really, theyve earned it.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

You might want to sit down

Wow. Just wow. Good going Melbourne. You must be so proud. That dude in the leather jacket at the end sure is.

Let us remember a time when THIS was the worst rap to stab our ears and eyes. A happier time.

Thursday, October 22, 2009


Not here tho.

Ive decided to compartmentalize a bit.
From now on, music is at or here for the ultra lazy like me.

Crap like this will continue to live here, amongst the other flotsam.

"Where do i start" is right. That grease is disgusting and those singing hamburgers with the lipstick are sluts.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Now Im not one to nit pic...

A part of me feels bad doing this. I mean, here we have Cheri. An 80s band who, despite some serious quality work, never really made it. I mean, i assume there are people (like me) who think they were just tops, but that doesnt really pay rent now does it.

Anyway, this was my introduction to Cheri. And boy did I squeal when i got this for 50cents. In fact, i think i liked it so much that i managed to ignore a rather glaring error on Cheri's part.

Good song, right? Yeah. But see, its not really Murphy's Law she's bitching about. Its Karma. But, i guess Karma doesnt really have that "ring"...that "je ne sais quoi" that is so important in ugh, "artistic license". And perhaps my inability to excuse (or actually, my even noticing such an ideological error) is just further evidence that I am getting old and cranky.

BUT. The 2 rule applies, and i found this also, and its both ideologically correct, and questionably uh, well... you listen.

PS. Im still looking for this MP3 which has been incredibly impossible to find. Should you feel generous....

Thursday, August 6, 2009

The Strange Case of Alice Cooper

This is why i dont go to concerts often.

What is the chance im gonna see a GIGANTIC BOTTLE OF TEQUILA dancing on the stage? WITH A HAT!? A cyclops with a headlight for an eye? Costumes w a codpiece? (ugh dont mention lady caca here).... Zero chance. And Im an optimist.

Here's part one. From the record written in the mental institution. I cant say i really love this record, but, man, could he put on a show. He also does old songs, but im a sucker for a bottle that dances while im sober, so i posted the first one.


Family of Eve: I wanna be loved by you

Family of Eve: Having it so bad for you

Bernard Estardy: Autoscopie

Bernard Estardy: Ala Mia Thra

Yellow Magic Orchestra: 1000 Knives Live (and really &@#*(&(@# good)

Yellow Magic Orchestra: Behind the Mask

Moroder: Tears

Moroder: fIrst hand experience in 2nd hand love

The Clash: Magnificent Seven

The Clash: Ivan Meets GI Joe

Alex Gibson Punk Parade

Alex Gibson: Suburbia (Soundtrack)

Monday, August 3, 2009

Mr Goodbar

DAMN! Tits been a while, huh? Lol sorry, got myself a life. Not really a fantastic one, but one that keeps me busy.

Ok im lying. But the good thing about neglect is that it allows you to amass a whole lotta lovin while you're off doing whatever, which is amplified by the guilt you feel upon your return!

So here's the better songs from the insanely overpriced Looking for Mr Goodbar cd.

Donna Summer: Try Me I Know We Can Make It

Donna Summer: Could It Be Magic

Greg Diamond Starcruiser: Danger (12")

Boz Scaggs: Lowdown

Commodores: Machine Gun

DIana Ross Love Hangover (subbed out for Dont Leave me this way by thelma H cos uh, w/e)