What do you do for a living, slice cold cuts? (and other quality dissery)

Ah, the 'dis song. I love the 'dis song. I've been the subject of a dis' song. They are the underrated subject matter of the music world.

The way i see it, artists have a varied amount of lyrical subjects to choose from: I rate them on a scale of 1-10 (1 = low and stupid; 10 being excellent). Love is a solid 2 with hopes of a 4 at best. Unless its love of sex, and that can be a 4, but it can go up to a 7 if done properly. Cars and modes of transport are 4. Yourself? Can be a 5 but can go up to 7 or 8. Others? Well... that can be a 10 if done RIGHT.

here are examples of such "righteousness".

Truly Yours: Kool G Rap/ DJ Polo


"by the way...guess who made his license plates?"

I just cant help but laugh. That is some FINE dissery.

This is, in my humble opinion, the funniest, nastiest dis song ever. The part about the girls. That part is a solid TEN. The first half may even go to 11. Makes "a bitch is a bitch" by NWA a 5. Re: the gay thing? Eh, kinda weak and mean. But heavy penalty b/c the rhymes are weak. However, it comes back hard. And it gets a 10 because of its "can do" attitude.

Some other examples of fine dissery:

Chickenheads: Project Pat

NOW THIS IS QUALITY! I love this song. The back and forth between them is one of the funniest things on record. Humor shows intelligence. She gives it good- and actually, when you analyze it, he never really "addresses" her specific dis's (re: his gas tank, the light bill, etc) whereas she really comments back on what he finds offensive about her (the face she made when he walked up on her friend etc...). However, line wise, Project Pat takes it with the last line...
"What you need some gum? Breath like the thunder...what you lookin at, I dont want your phone number.."

From punk rock music/movie land... the infamous naked girl at show

"I think id like to fuck your brains out...but it doesnt look like you have any" *2.46

For those of you who care, this is from a terrible movie called Suburbia. It came out in the 80s maybe and it was about.zzzzzz... notable for TSOL's performance and this scene which put the fear of GOD in me about punk shows when i was a kid. Until i went to one. And then i understood the term "artistic glamorization bordering on delusional".