Better live...

Devo: Uncontrollable Urge (so good youll never listen to the record again)

Fleshtones: Shadowline

The Alley Cats: Nothing Means Nothing

Au Pairs: Its Obvious (JUST as good on record). Sorry folks, i posted Come Again by the Au Pairs. Its from the same record Im pretty sure. And you should buy EVERYTHING of theirs b/c they were everything bikini kill wished they could be. Like GOOD.

Oh hey, if ANYONE has Urgh! email me too.
Here's "Its Obvious". Shes so badass. Love it. Live it.

Leap year love song

My dedication to February 29

Because its shuggie otis

Im in the mood for this record today. I wish there were live vids of Shuggie. Hes totally cute.



And in an INCREDIBLY RARE show of public affection, I will say this song goes out to my husband. Because he finally read my blog today.

Now this just made my day

Its been a bad morning. No Big Star/Alex Chilton vids on youtube. A bizarre bunch of songs on my computer that are totally terrible and w/o titles. Its cold. Im lonely.

However, good old cheeseball Egyptian Lover has come to my rescue with this really sub par audio/video offering. And huzzah, I am lonely no more.



With a line like "Im kinda desperate...lets get it on" how can you POSSIBLY turn this man down? It ties with "I'd like to scramble your eggs from the inside" as far as pillow talk goes.

Telex takes us to St Tropez

First Moscow Disco. Now St Tropez.


This is actually pretty damn catchy.

Hall of Fame: The best movies ever made

The Construction Worker from the Village People: I love you to death. From the greatest movie of ALL TIME: Cant Stop the Music.



Whoever has the rights to this wonderful, WONDERFULLY terrible movie keeps taking it off you tube. So watch while its hot.

This is really the Citizen Kane of crap people.

Here's the second best movie. Its called "the Apple" and its almost as good as Cant Stop the Music. Actually, its completely TERRIBLE.

Here's a taste...

How anti- american. And pro speed? What? And ok its from the 80s, but its canada and they are always behind anyway.

I realized that I might not have made it completely clear how terrible this movie is. Here's the trailer. This should get my point across.


And last...but by no means least...
Sgt Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band: Bee Gees and Frampton

and a bunch of people that were totally high when they did this. This is a terrible terrible movie.

But, here's a good scene from it

Look! its my dream basement! Video games galore! No pinball tho. And my pachinko machine isnt there, so its not really my dream basement. But more important, why are all the things i like always represented in shiteous film as being indicative of "badness"? UNFAIR.

They are all terrible in their own terrible way, but i love them and own all three. And chances are if you know me, you've seen them too. And you should. See them, not necessarily know me.

No more bread and butter...and possibly testicles

The Newbeats: Bread and Butter



Ok so its not disco. However, its noteworthy because:
1. Its a fun song about food and infidelity and the importance of a wife cooking a meal for her husband (or man, or woman per se).
2. Take a good look at the singer. This is the first time Ive seen his face. Prior to seeing said face, I thought (a) the singer was a woman, and (b) the singer was black.
WHOOPS.

Music so good that it makes me feel bad.

ORS: MoonBoots. The synchronized dancing just kills me too. I need a good cry.


Punkin Machine: Tonight... its @ 2.35 or something.


Most of this song is so good it makes me sick to my stomach. Almost as sick as the entire video makes me. Never before have i pined so hard for the "spinning record with text over it".

Speaking of pining, this record is 99 EUROS. Euros. Fantastic.


I just cheered myself up by watching the video for "Lets Chill" by Guy. Oh Ted, thank you for cheering me up with your utter lack of talent and literal interpretation of your incomprehensibly profound lyrics. Thanks for saving me from an otherwise intellectually exhausting afternoon trying to figure that shit out.

Im Really Gifted

When it comes to finding total crap on you tube. It just comes to me. If only buckets of money would come as easy.

I came across this, um, whatever it is, when I was looking for videos by a disco band called Lace.

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? A bartender with a CHERRY HEAD? This is a first. And hopefully a last. Im not one for dispensing advice, BUT, If you go to a bar and see the bartender has a head that is, in fact, a cherry (as opposed to red from being an alcoholic) then id say its time to stop drinking there.



oh, and who is "fruitier"; the dudes in the band (dressed as fruit) or the nelson brothers in the leather pants?

Moments & Whatnauts: Girls

Sunday Soul... Sexism soundin sexy....So sexy.


Also, I tried to look for Egyptian Lover's "girls" but came across this gem. Its called the Pilot and is described as follows:

1984) A young girl struggling with insecurities and being unpopular, develops an alter-ego as 'The Pilot', the best breaker in town. She must prove she's got the talent if she wants respect. Very cheesy and kiddish but very cool moves and amazing soundtrack by Egyptian Lover. (ed note: UM, no. not amazing at all. in fact, girls is the only good song by EL and i only like it b/c a boy i used to date put it on a mixtape for me when i was 19 and it was pretty hot).

Harpo: Rock N Roll Clown.

Im speechless. He haw hehawhehaw...

Looking for Mr Disco

Looking for Mr. Goodbar. Greatest soundtrack ever. Yes, better than that other disco one. This song pretty much sums up the plot of the movie. She teaches kids by day, and goes to bars at night looking for random sex with men. Or, sex with random men. Depends on which one you "accentuate". I believe she cared more about the sex. In fact, i know she did. Little thrill seeker she was. Real wild.

(4.00+ for hot disco hoover action)


Which of course means that she dies at the end. In the book at least. Beat to death. By a dude in the bedroom with a lamp (i think)after he fails to achieve an erection and becomes embarrassed. My mom said this movie caused a bunch of controversy b/c it was a response to the whole "sexual womans lib" thing that basically said "enjoy yourself too much and you end up like her". Dead.

Actually, this was based on a real life crime: the Murder of Roseann Quinn. From what i just read on wiki, the lamp beating was not what really happened. And what really happened to her is really truly terrible. The flaccid penis thing did happen tho.

But back to happy music land. So you dont think im talkin shit, its got "try me i know we can make it" on it. By Donna Summer. The best song of hers. And the version on LFMG is the BEST version of it. I swear to you. Its like they took out the garbage in that song, added some breathier vocals and the best song was born. Selah.

I looked for the CD on amazon and its 70$. Yes, CD.
I got in on vinyl.

Jesus, Diane Keaton was at her 70s best wasn't she?

Saturday Disco Hotness

Invisible Mans Band: All Night Thing


Don Ray/Cerrone: Got to have love (also, check out "standing in the rain" good song)


Poussez: Never Gonna Say Goodbye


Bumblebee Unlimited: Lady Bug



Pam Tood and Love Exchange: Lets Get it Together (and make some love!)

The Cat from Outer Space!

Good god. Sandy Duncan? MASH people? Come on... really?



Doesn't everyone know some pussy they suspect to be from another planet?

Gee! Your Hair Smells...Terrific?

Lets all gather around the fire and talk about hair products. Specifically shampoo and a hair cleanser of years past. Get ready for: Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific.

Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific: In Spanish!


Yes, that was the name of a shampoo. At least I think it was a shampoo; i'm not entirely sure. If its a dry shampoo, i dont consider it a shampoo. I dont consider spray on shampoos shampoo either. But, this only adds to its genius: here i am, waxing poetic about a product whose exact use i dont know and who i may or may not have any need for. And the bottle? Oh just as genius.

The smell? Dunno; however, ITS BACK ON THE MARKET! After being relegated to the South East Asian markets, its back here and on the internet! The same bottle too! Hopefully not from stock made in the 70s. And hopefully not smelling like Durian.

Ill let you know if it fact it does "smell terrific". In fact, if my husband gets home and I am not greeted with either GYHST or an updated version of said phrase, im asking for my money back, but im keeping the bottle.

A "lesser" shampoo: not as good looking and may or may not smell terrific, but looks like it "did the job".



Is it getting hot in here? Looks like she let him win at chess, but she won in the end. Or maybe he won in her end. Who cares, her hair looked good. And isnt that whats important here?

Lets Party: Detroit

Happy Snowy Friday everyone!
Lets heat it up with

Watts Club Mozambique's dancers: holy hotness! Capital Punishment! Another level!....


Sigh, strictly ghetto...rock hard! OMFG!

The Scene: Detroit's version of Soul Train and completely TOPS.
Number of Names: Sharevari


The Scene: Kano Im Ready.


News show re: the scene


Seriously, how great was this show? If anyone has ANY copies of ANY episodes of THE SCENE (NOT the New Dance Show), PLEASE EMAIL ME AND LET ME KNOW.

No offense to the NDS, but its not as good as its predecessor the Scene. Music wise, fashion wise...entertainment wise. Age before beauty i guess.

Detroit Jit:


Im sorta not into the whole detroit jit thing. The music is god awful. Like a night at the Tunnel. The marriage of techno and that dancing is um....not palatable to me. Like nuts and gum. Actually UNlike nuts and gum. Now, eating nuts and gum at the Tunnel? That may be a bit much for me. For anyone. Im only human goddamnit.

The gas station 99cent cassette tape winners

Not that i found either of these songs in the bargain bin, but im sure they are there and Ill look on my next trip up to Vermont.
It has been written.

Vehicle by Ides of March


Its pretty embarrassing how i came across this song. I inadvertently left on fox one night after Seinfeld, and American Idol came on. It was disco song night. So of course I watched. Bo Bice sang this song, and well, I felt about it the same way i did when i saw Michael Bolton do opera on the Grammy's that year. Like ashamed because i didnt think it was half bad. In FACT, its my opinion that when otherwise mediocre (or sub mediocre) artists do anything that is half decent, they should be publicly praised for it.

Climax Blues Band: Couldnt get it right (live)


This song is great on record. Not so great live (here anyway). But again, another tune that took me ages to identify. And another one in the 'where are they now' pile.

Kookie, Kookie, lend me your electric hot comb

The worst song begat the worlds worst endorsement and endorser.


This leaves me with a statement AND a question:
Question: Does this mean that the girl whining in the song will FINALLY get that gross old (and apparently no longer useful) comb?

Statement: This would have been better if the comb fell in some water or he used it while bathing. Then maybe the girl would get the comb by default. I mean, dead men cant comb their hair. Although in his honor, i bet if one could, it would be Kookie.

Sick Boys vs Love Child

I was going to write something clever here, but its cold, im cranky and tired.
So i will use this rare opportunity to say that, despite my husbands well (but ill) informed opinion, Sick Boys is NOT the greatest skate video ever.

Here's sick boys (or part of it). Its coming out on dvd and the sad thing is, i know when it comes out im not only going to end up buying it, but i will be forced to watch it. Its animal chin all over again.




What is MY favorite skate video? Well im glad you asked me. What, you didnt ask?
Too bad. Its love child. One of my favorite memories is watching this video in my friend Sam's basement when i was about 16 years old. 4 of us idiots gathered around a tv that was blocked by his sister's playpen. It is the marriage of my two loves in one great old video that isnt dated even though its pretty damn old. Like me.

DWS


JT...


Second fave? Whiskey I. Cant find it online, so here's boozy in part II.


Next purchase when its on DVD if it isnt already... Natas may suck, but the Gonz doesnt.

Im in love

With this. Whose remix is this?

What do YOU think?

When i first heard D.A.N.C.E, it bothered me...like, this reminds me of something. Something that wasnt as good.

Then I came across this. And i remembered Boney M. And how their version of I Cant Stand the Rain is the best version of that song. And then i remembered that the song i liked was NOT in fact by Boney M, but by Eruption. And then I said, oh so it totally makes sense that i dont like Ma Baker, b/c i guess i dont like Boney M.

Still a good song... a real good song... better than Boney M. Way better. And as an added bonus, I havent heard this song ad nauseum, so i can still enjoy it. Its one of the fringe benefits of having your musical head up your metaphorical ass. Eventually, it all "gets" there, so to speak. And by the time it does, no one else wants to be bothered with it.

Also, my dog LOVES this song. It always gets his tail wagging.


but...

Boney M: Happy Song
Maybe its the kids? On some days, I feel it. Some days I dont.


here's eruption. The lead singer of this band, I think, is absolutely perfect. In every way. Every way.


UPDATE! I found an OK Boney M song. (see earlier post re: musical mediocrity and one offs) Even better? Bad vocal synch up and bad, BAD dancing. Daddy may be cool, but he cant dance for shit.

Daddy Cool. Redemption.

Hot Blood: Soul Dracula

this will suck the life out of you. Happy Valentines Day.

Fifty dollars or more

Let me tell you a story. Some many years ago, I was frequently dragged to what they used to call raves. Now besides from being a dog and pony show featuring the worst dressed people EVER, the "music" at these raves was pretty much always truly truly terrible. Except for a few choice songs, my ears were usually subjected to either noisy thumps or the slurred words of blissed out kids asking for back rubs.
I'm a fan of neither.
But i did like this song.

John Wilson: Fine Art Films

There will be plenty of crap on this website. For now, please enjoy the following videos animated by one of my heroes, John Wilson. I wish they would have given him better songs to work with, but, eh, what can you do. I guess Sonny and Cher had a lot of pull back then.

Angie Baby: Helen Reddy (the CREEPIEST song ever and one of my favorites)
This video was banned. Lets see if you can guess why.



Big Yellow Taxi: Joni Mitchell
(that shit song that was covered a few years ago about paving a parking lot)


Reachin: Bob Moline


Dark Lady: The ONE Cher im putting up

The closest ill get to Xenon Disco

and its wonderful flashing cassette tape.

Everyone moans about the demise of the Garage, the Loft and blah blah, but to me, the real disco interior design tragedy is the demise of Xenon. I dont think Ive ever seen a tackier decor in my life. Its like a bagel nosh turned into a disco.

I like my interiors "did" and "seizure inducing"- and Xenon looks like it put an awful lot of effort making sure that every odd looking piece of flashing junk made its way onto the walls, floors and ceilings.

Transport me back in time, give me some goddamn earplugs (b'c i really dont like MOST italo disco/JBtz) and give me a bagel.

Orlando Johnson: Chocolate City


Filliponio: All'arrembaggio
Some sexy italian stuff sung by a not so sexy italian man. He gets the Patric Duvet award for stage presence.

New Wave Country, foreign oddities and french people

If you would have told me someone made a song where they meshed new wave and country together, i wouldn't have believed them. Its just too perfect to be true. And a video too? Now youre just playing with me. Thats really not cool you know.




But they did. And its as wonderful as you would expect something that features wooden barrels, a German man singing in a fringed suede jacket, a slide guitar, a girl dancing around in camel toe jeans AND a kid doing the robot to be.




How terrible is this video? Even more puzzling/amazing is how they managed to keep all their furry heads and googley eyes on during the taping. Sure, its all fun and games until some "thing" with a guitar loses an eye and she slips on it. Then they'll technically be taking her lower. Bad pun I know, but really, look what i have to work with.

The band is named Ganymed. Ganymed is also an asteroid (or a moon depending on how you spell it) and a pharmaceutical company. Strange bedfellows? Not really.





Patric Juvet! The Singing Castrati! He loves america b/c we celebrate the castrati range- dont we, Justin Timberlake.
Actually im not convinced he loves America. He isn't really moving very much. If this great land incites such passion, dontcha think he would move a little?

Blast Off!