Im Sorry!

More Stairway to Stardom.

This show continues to amaze! The parade of no talent seems endless!

Quite possibly... no, DEFINITELY the world's worst puppet show.

Never mind that you can see her head. Never mind that her characters are borderline retarded and keep switching accents. Im concerned with the fungibility of the crocodiles eyes. They look a lot like cherry tomatoes. Is it fair to allow a child to get all emotionally involved with a puppet who will have rotten smelly eyes? Or, is madame puppet master just going to change the eyes all the time to prevent spoilage? Im an optimist, and even I don't think she has that sort of dedication. Judging by the time and effort she put into writing this piece of trash, my guess is that crocodile went to permanently hide in a landfill 1-2-3-4 seconds after she got off stage.

Maybe he found new eyes in the garbage.

The Hal Green Trio BUTCHER some song.

Im not sure if this is a real song, or a song created especially for the show. I like to think it was created just for me. It makes up for the fact that they all fell asleep during their performance.

The Uncomfortable Vocal Stylings of this girl
Louise Masca: Let Me Entertain You.

Gross. Gross gross. Even the tape was like, NUH UH at :38. That being said, I remember this song was in my learn to play piano book. Its a rather sexualized song for a piano book. Not like Greensleves. Now THATS a song for a piano book.
That song has all the raw sexuality of toilet paper.

Oh GOD! I found her an equally disturbing MALE child singer.

Keep those two away from one another! They are a duo just WAITING to happen. Kismet! They'll do such oversexed duets as "secret lovers" and "baby come to me". And i'll probably be dead from excitement.

And we'll close out this mess with some choreographed dance numbers.


Yes, you read that correctly: this routine was CHOREOGRAPHED. When? Dunno, but from the looks of it about ten seconds before she went on. Which would mean that her mom choreographed that crap back stage while fixing the loose sequins plotting escape from that awful outfit. Or, maybe "writhe and breathe" is her mom's idea of choreography.

Bodysuit girl does "thriller"

Aside from a few winces at the beginning, this vid isnt half bad. We'll its bad, but in comparison, its not that bad.

So then WHY am i posting it?
Because she's a RIP OFF. Creepy bodysuit dances have been SO DONE. And by Bob Fosse.
Shame on you bodysuit girl. SHAME ON YOU. Even your ill fitting underwear doesn't out creep THIS dance number.

Bye Bye Life: from All That Jazz featuring dancing bodysuit girls

I've been waiting for an opportune time to post this and LO! I found it! Im not a huge fan of this flick, but as a child, this scene kind of bothered me. Not the whole "imminent death with no love to show for it" part. The bodysuits. All those veins. Eugh.

Watching it now, it makes me feel sad for Ben Vereen.

Bye bye your career goodbye!

The Fantastic Planet Part II

5. Humans get busy & act like humans


6. one of the creepier parts of the movie and probably the most famous


7 uh oh


8. The End.

ALL teenagers are complete pains in the asses

Even in the animal kingdom they are all ESPECIALLY ANNOYING.

bad mantis, originally uploaded by lauralogic77.

Take this one.

He fights with his/her brothers/sisters. He goes to the worst part of the tank and stays there for hours swatting at everyone that even comes near him (except me, he loves me). He bites the heads off his food and then doesnt eat the rest of them. He likes to come out, and when he gets a chance to, he REFUSES to return to his tank, making sure i have to spend a good fifteen minutes with my hand in his house trying to shove him on a tree. Only to have him climb up my hand again, sit down and proceed to scratch himself in my palm of my hand. Or go on the afghan and get yarn all over him. Or just plain refuse to move when he decides he feels like sitting outside for a while and watching me fret about getting him back in his tank alive.

He's quickly becoming my favorite!

Fantastic Planet.

Apparently someone re-mixed songs from Fantastic Planet?

Really? REALLY?? I need to sit down for a second, Im getting kind of dizzy.

I saw this movie when I was very very young, and after watching it again tonight its as CREEPY and wonderful as I remember it to be. The music is a big plus too.

Fantastic Planet: 1st half of it, anyway. 2nd half later. Its long.

1

Any movie that refs sisyphus in the first three minutes is tops in my book by DEFAULT.

2


3


4


Now INTERMISSION (read: sleep)

Oh, it looks good on YOU though.

This may be the greatest 2:48 in film. Free soup with purchase of hat.

I normally would write a bunch, but really. Do I need to?

Bonus Non Sequitur movie trailer b/c I dont want to listen to music post!

"I was born a poor black child..."

Classic.
Ok back to work.

More! Stairway to Stardom

This show reminds me of the Winchester House. You know, that house that was so haunted the owner built all these staircases and doors that went nowhere?

Hairdresser. A song where a woman who looks like Hillary Clinton "sings" a sophmoric "song" about the positive affect a good haircut can have on your life. And then sings a song that is COMPLETELY unrelated in the middle of it.


I dont even KNOW where to start, but i guess "Cut my hair it wont behave....set it up with gel and wave; 2 ringlets...keep the top a little wet" is as good a place as any, huh? SO GOOD. Of course she's antsy in that chair! She's got places to go and people to see! And planets to fly to and government secrets to pass onto the ants that live in the empty soda bottles in her house.

You know, more people need to write songs about good haircuts. Just not her. Don't mess with perfection.

Gloria Huddle: Hello Operator

Operator? Information? Can i have the number for the nearest mental hospital?

She begins to sing around :50 in. Not that talking to herself in an English accent isn't entertaining, but she goes completely certifiable in the song. Even the people in the background are stunned.

This show is quickly becoming my favorite thing ever. Its so low rent. Its so awful. In fact, its so terrible it arcs past awful and somehow makes it back to good. Like a circle. Like the circle of life. Good and bad. Gothic beauty. Etc etc.

Um yea whatever, its completely stupid. Glory-ah has a serious case of weird eye and its giving me the CREEPS.

Did I just hear something? Why are my windows rattling? Operator? Information?

the Good, the Bad and the Uglee: Hip Hop Edition

The Good:
Daytona 500: Ghostface...Ghostface

Actually fuck that, the AWESOME. I remember seeing this when i was younger and thinking it was one of the greatest videos. Its still really good.
In fact, its my third favorite animation video. 1st: Angie Baby. 2nd: Outlander's Vamp: crap song GREAT video


The Bad:
Someone from UM's version of Oochie Coochie by Mc Brains.

A terrible song made worse. Thats kind of impressive actually. This video sort of encapsulates everything that was incorrect in the 90s. Which was everything.

The Ugly
Diamond D mentions Staten Island but is still um, not, um...aesthetically appealing.

I love DD. But like as a friend. In fact, if i could create a hip hop superman, there would be some DD up in there. A bunch actually. Not in the face department, but there nonetheless.

Oh and PS. Since when is a pair of Kenneth Coles an example of extravagant spending?
If thats Sally's idea of high fashion/nifty gifties, then you need to stop complaining, D.