PBS crap from MY PAST

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No wonder Im such an idiot. Just look at this crud I used to watch. I LOVED THIS. Watching it now, im slightly horrified.
First, the whole worm/bird having to share a home. That is just terrible, terrible that the poor things have to live together instead of being able to act out gods great plan of one being the other's dinner. All because of the ever increasing cost of local rents in their area. Can a premise BE MORE STUPID? The only thing that comes close to being as stupid is that whole "tshirt over a collared shirt" thing he has going on. Who does this?

Oh, and how BITTER am I about that pen? Did they ever make it? I dont think they did. I wanted that pen. I still want that pen. Nothing screams mature adult like a beeping pen, right? I just checked: they did make the pen and there are some really crazy people out there willing to pay some serious money for one. DAYUMN! Picture Pages!

OK: GET READY PEOPLE. Im about to introduce you to what I consider, my lowest, LOWEST, point of tv watching as a child.

Square One TV. It taught you math and it was on PBS. It was on after some science show i used to dig. I also stunk at math so i figured, eh. Im not even going to do the math and see how old i was when i watched it, b/c its probably terribly embarrassing. (Phew, i was like 10).

Im game for anything that i may learn something from, and (on the bright side) this is really terrible, even by childrens programming standards. That menacing tornado thing and his bone chilling intro music! Cant you just FEEL THE TENSION? No? Granted, this wasnt a mensa exam: its PBS for god sakes. And probably like Canadian. BUT: I bet you didnt know a square was actually a rectangle. I didnt.

And therein lies the problem with SQ1. Well, one of them. Sometimes, in between gasps of astonishment, eye closing winces and bearing witness to what some will do for an Actor's Equity card, you learnd-ed things. But usually not.

Here's a love song about....percentages.

"eight hundreths of the time youre the only girl on my mind". SWOON! If someone said that to me, I'd break 80% of their teeth and knee them in 50% of their balls. That adds up to 130%. Im a special kinda gal I guess. I cant be confined by your 100% oppressive normality. I just wont.

Be/c im feeling generous Im going to spare you Mathnet, and all the other "math related" skits and songs. You tube them tho. But make sure you have a bucket handy. Use it for either puking in or hitting me as punishment for introducing you to its awfulness. Please NOT BOTH. One or the other.

And for redemption: This show was great. Im hoping this is included in the "life flashing before my eyes" thing when i die.

But, knowing my luck it will be SQUARE ONE!